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小学生英语搞笑短剧剧本《西游记》台词完整版

小学生英语搞笑短剧剧本《西游记》台词完整版

英语搞笑短剧剧本《西游记》
人物:T:唐僧 陈鹏   M:孙悟空 陈中良  P:猪八戒 李涛  S:沙僧 魏涛
X:白骨精原型 李鹏程    X1:白骨精变成的男人 
X2:白骨精变成的女人 刘佳佳  Q:女儿国王后 徐静静
 
T: Wow…,boys,this place looks beautiful. where we are now?Does any one of you young men know what this place is?
众徒弟们摇头,除了八戒在看书。
T: bajie, give me the map(不回头,懒洋洋的问)
T:bajie? Give the map to me!(严肃的问)
T:bajie! Give the fucking……..(转过身看到八戒在看书)
T:(很吃惊) hey!bajie,you are making youself a new man.what kind of book are you reading? Is it 《jingangjing》 or 《dabeizhou》?
八戒依旧看书,不理睬。
T:(凑过去)let me have a look at it!
八戒才注意,赶忙藏书。但为时已晚,T一把抢过。发现是封面女郎很惹火,眼神立刻变得温柔,接过书开始看
T:yao….xi…..(流口水,八戒看到,拿出卫生纸给唐僧擦,唐僧回过神来)
T:(转身训斥八戒)how many times I have told you! You are not supposed to read this kind of book! I will keep it for you until the trip is end…..(唐僧将画册掖到衣服里)
P:But..um,why boss,why you always said we can never touch girls?I just do not understand…
T:(sigh),how many times I have to tell you ,That is because…
(唐僧摆出一个酷酷的动作,一边跳舞,一边开始唱歌,Jackson的dangeous)
………
P:I know
 
T:Monkey,I am hungry.Go and get me some food….Shaseng,you go feed the horse. (声音放低)and I think it is the time for me to call my little honey pony(甜蜜的,一边掏出手机,回头看到八戒在身边) hey!pig, get out of here !give me some private space!
唐僧开始给Q打电话
T:hi..how you’re doing(不解释….)
Q:I am fine,but I miss you.Since you left,I can not stoping recalling the days we are together..but you do not even give me a call
T:oh darling….i am sorry.these boys are so gaush,it is not convenient to phone you.But you know I love you…oh…they are back! Fuck u boys,can you give me a moment of peace…
 
M:who you are phoning,boss?
T:er (支支吾吾的)I was just having a chat with Budda. where is my food?
M:here! I found some delicious bananas!
T:bananas again?! How many times I have told you!i am a monk, not a monkey! I want meat, meat(加重语气)!don’t you understand? The next time,you still brings me nothing but bananas, I think we can do nothing but eat your buddy pig(眼睛瞄向八戒,流口水)
(T拿起手机)
T:I will call you later,honey,I miss you
Q:me too,I will be on the phone,bye…
 
唐僧拿着香蕉,从衣服里掏出画册,做到一边边吃边看,边擦嘴…..
白骨精上场
X;Hahahaaa…I heard that any monster eating master tang will get a infinite life.how lucky am I,they are in my area.Wow,I get to come up with a plan. Ehn…..get it! i can pretend to be a poor man,so they will trust me.haha……change change……
转了几圈,变成了一个男人。
X1:I look great!
蹒跚的走过去
X1:hello,master..i have not have food for days….can you give me some?
T(瞄一眼,继续吃、看)what? i myself is starving now.out of here, you bastard! Pig,beat him,get him out of here.
M正好回来 将它打死.
T:er…..悟空,I told you to get him out of here,not beat him to death…..
Next time don’t do this kind of thing(摇头但继续吃,看书)
M: whatever, all right(懒得解释)
(悟空看到美女画册,急忙凑上去看,师傅把画册上下左右移动,悟空随之移动,师傅发现了,开始说:)
Ah, wukong ,you want to have a look at it,aren’t you ,If you want to just tell me, I will give it to you, if you don’t tell me how can I know that you want to have a look at it, even if you think in your heart that you want to have a look at it, if you don’t tell me, I still do not know that you want to have a look at it…….(悟空早已痛苦不堪,逃离此地)
T:wukong!come back!(唐僧摇摇头,继续看书)
 
X:(看到画册)ah…..I got a idea!
变成了一个女的
说话一定要嗲
X2:(曼妙的走过来,碰一下唐僧,唐僧不转头:leave me alone.x2有碰一下,来自99剧本网。唐僧依然不转头:I said leave me alone.这时,x2开口说话)
X2:hi….Mr handsome!
T:(转头)wow…hi beauty!(扔掉画册,背景音乐响起,only you,神情对视,过会儿)come here,do you want some food?take some bananes。 i am tang seng,you can call me Tanny
X:hi Tanny…you look great,maybe we can have some time together alone
T:yeah,you are right, what are we waiting for?! Let us go!
(半路碰到悟空,悟空火眼金睛看出是妖怪)
M:Monster!!look at how I beat you….
(唐僧赶忙拦住)
T:what you are doing,you bastard monkey!this beautiful lady is my guest,
M:boss,it is a monster,he change himself into a charming girl so as to attact you.he will eat you
T:bullshit!you must be fed up with this trip to west…..
(悟空执意要打,唐僧苦劝不听)
T:I think you little monkey need some punishment(摆姿势,要念咒语)
M:(赶忙说)oh,no, master,not that spell.
Q:(sigh)it is so late!(念咒,喜洋洋美羊羊灰太狼红太郎,别看我只是一只羊……悟空落荒而走)
T安慰x2之后,继续走,一段路之后:
X2:hahaha…..look at who I am (变回原样,唐僧大喊救命)
.X2:i will eat you….
 
Q及时赶来,从悟空那里得知了情况
Q:monster!...stop!he is my man....
(转向T)you get attracted by this ugly monster,are you gay?(不可思议的)
T:no, I am not!(有口莫辩)
Q(面向x):who are you?
X:I am baigujing….and you?
Q:doesn’t matter.i will finish you(举起魔杖,要说阿瓦达索命,突然停住)Oh…but you look familiar….you are xiaobai?
X:you are小小? it must been hundreds of years since the last time I met you,where have you been these years.
Q:why do not contact me?
X:I do not know your number…..
this is your man?!
Q:how could it be possible(走过来,把唐僧拨拉到一旁)..i miss you,小白
X:I miss you too……(背景音乐响起,《红豆》)
X:how about a cup of tea in my house?
Q: that would be perfect, let us go….
 
音乐停,场上只有唐僧,犹豫的望着天空,音乐换成《可惜不是你》
一会儿,悟空和八戒上场,安慰唐僧,重新上路《敢问路在何方》…..
全剧终
 
 
(以上为完整内容)

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