小学生英语搞笑改编短剧剧本《孙悟空三打白骨精》台词完整版

    Beatit!

    人物：T:唐僧   M:孙悟空   P:猪八戒   S:沙僧

    X:白骨精原型     B1:白骨精变成的村姑

    B2:白骨精变成的漂亮的女人   B3:白骨精变成男人

    T:Emitofo,Wow…,boys,thisplacelooksbeautiful.wherewearenow?......Doesanyoneofyouknowwhatthisplaceis?

    众徒弟们摇头，除了八戒在看书。

    T:bajie,givemethemap(不回头，懒洋洋的问)

    T:bajie?Givethemaptome!（严肃的问）

    八戒依旧看书，不理睬。

    M:Idiot,Whatareyoulookingat?

    孙悟空用棍子打了一下八戒，八戒才注意，赶忙藏书。但为时已晚，M一把抢过。

    M:Look，monster…..(把书抢走交给师傅)

    T:(很吃惊)（转身训斥八戒）Bajie!HowManytimesIhavetoldyou,don’tbringthesepicturesofbeautifulgirls!

    P:Oh,master!Forgiveme。Iwillneverdothisagain(伸手拿回)

    T:(缩手)I’llkeepitforyouuntilwereachthewest.

    P:Master,wehavearrivedinWhiteTigerMountain!AhIcan’twalkonanymore!(坐)Mystomachdoesn’tallowso.我这肚子饿了。

    M:FatPig!

    P:Monkey,ifyoudaretosaythesetwowordsonceagain,Iwill,Iwill……….

    M:Youwillwhat(凶相)?

    P:Iwillhelpyoucatchfleas跳蚤。

    M:Hm！

    T:（轻咳）Wukong,factually,Iamabithungry.Couldyougotogetsomefood forme?

    P:Yousee,masterishungry,too!

    T:Baijie! Don’tforgetwhoatemylastmeal!

    S:Butmaster, ifamonstercomeswhilebrothermonkeyisaway….

    T:Em…Itisaproblem.Wukong,doyouhaveanyidea?

    M:Noproblem!(画圈)

    S:Thisis…..?

    M:Electricnet伏魔圈!Imadethis.Nomonstercanapproachyouifyoustayinit.

    T:Em……ok，that’sgood，wewillstayinit!Monkey,Youfindthefoodasquicklyaspossible.Iamsohungry.

    S:Ok,master.Bye!(飞走)

    T:It’ssoboring,Let’splaycards!(三人开始打牌)音乐《斗地主》

    白骨精上场

    X;Hahahaaa…Iheardthatanymonstereatingmastertangwillgetainfinitelife.howluckyamI,theyareinmyarea.Wow, Ishould comeupwithaplan.Ehn…..getit!icanpretendtobeapoorwoman, sotheywilltrustme.haha……changechange……

    转了几圈，变成了一个村姑B1。

    B1:Ilookgreat!

    蹒跚的走过去，接近三人，看着他们在打牌…..

    B1:hello,gentelman…...CanIjoinyou?

    P:I’msorry,lady.WeareplayingFightingAgainstlandownerandthreepeopleareenough.不好意思，姑娘。我们在斗地主，三个人够了。

    B1:(在一旁观看)Oh,Chance!Bomb!噢，机会来了！炸弹！

    T:Bomb?(出牌)

    B1:DoubleKing!王炸！

    T:Oh….Iwin!Em……,Lady,youareaboss-hand.Comeinandteachme!

    喔…我赢了！嗯…，姑娘，你是老手吧。进来教我！

    M:(回来，看见B1)Oh,monster!(上前就打)

    B1:（倒)Ah…… 惨叫声

    T:(气愤)Wukong!Lookwhathaveyoudone!Sheismyteacher!

    M:Sheisamonster!

    T:Nonsense!(深呼吸)

    M:Oh,pleasedon’t……

    T:It’stoolate!(唱)Oncemore……youopenthedoor…(泰坦尼克主题曲，走音离谱)太晚了！ Oncemore……(紧箍咒)

    M:Please,Please,oh,no……(痛苦抱头)

    T:(呛住，咳)Wukong,I’mdisappointedwithyou!Sohaveyoutakesomedeliciousfoodforme?

    M:Yes,Master,Ifoundsomedeliciousbananas.

    T:bananasagain?!HowmanytimesIhavetoldyou!Iamamonk,notamonkey!Iwantmeat,meat(加重语气,又开始唱起泰坦尼克主题曲)

    M：OH,sorry,master,Please,no…….

    T:Getthemeatforme,quickly!（唐僧摇摇头，玩起手机来）

    白骨精变成了一位年轻漂亮的女子

    X2:（曼妙的走过来，碰一下唐僧，唐僧不转头：leavemealone.x2有碰一下，唐僧依然不转头：Isaidleavemealone.这时，x2开口说话）

    X2:hi….Mrhandsome!

    T:（转头）wow…hibeauty!（扔掉画册，背景音乐响起，onlyyou，神情对视，过会儿）comehere,doyouwantsomefood？takesomebananes。 iamtangseng,youcancallmeTanny

    X:hiTanny…youlookgreat,maybewecanhavesometimetogetheralone

    T:yeah,youareright,whatarewewaitingfor?!Letusgo!

    (半路碰到悟空，悟空火眼金睛看出是妖怪)

    M:Monster!!lookathowIbeatyouintohell.

    （唐僧没有拦的住）

    P&S:AreyouOk,moster?(扶T)

    S:Look,(伸食指)howmany?看，这是几？

    T:Two…..(晕乎乎地)

    T: Whatyouaredoing,youbastardmonkey!thisbeautifulladyismyguest,

    M:boss,itisamonster,hechangehimselfintoacharminggirlsoastoattactyou.hewilleatyou

    T:bullshit!youmustbefedupwiththistriptowest…..

    T：Ithinkyoulittlemonkeyneedsomepunishment(摆姿势，要念咒语)

    M：（赶忙说）oh,no,master,notthatspell.

    Q:(sigh)itissolate!(念咒，喜洋洋美羊羊灰太狼红太郎，别看我只是一只羊……悟空落荒而走)

    B3:SunWukong,gameover!(变成B3)

    孙悟空，游戏结束了！

    B3:(看到B1,B2尸体)Oh….,mydaughter,mywife!Whodidit?!!(哭喊)

    M:I’llkillyou,monster!(打)

    孙悟空突然冒出来打死妖精

    T:（想阻止，未及）You,you.....(险些晕，E,J扶住 )Youhavekilledthreelives!

    S:No,theyarenothumanbeings!Theyarecreatedbymonster!

    T:Monster?Youarearealmonster!Neverletmeseeyou,go!!

    M:(悲，离去)（音乐，营造 “假”悲伤气氛）《人鬼情未了》

    P:Master,brotherMonkeyis.......

    T:Don'tmentionthatguyanymore!

    B:(出现)Ha,ha,ha!(三尸体B1,B2,B3在B招手后“飘”走)

    T:（惊）Youare......

    B:Howfoolishyouare,MrTang!(E,J去阻斗，被击退)

    B:(抓住T)I'llenjoyyourmeatandblood,ha,ha...... 准备吃唐僧

    M:(悄悄走到B后，打B晕)

    T:Wukong?

    S:Oh,BrotherMonkey!（猴哥）

    P:Ourheroisback!

    T:I,Ican'tunderstand......Whathappened?

    S:Boss,yourIQneedsincreasing!Thismonsterchangeditsappearanceintothreeshapesinordertocheatyou!

    师傅，你应该提高一下智商了！这个妖怪为了骗你变化成三个模样！

    T:How,howdidyoufindout

    S:(沉默).......Monkey'sintuition(直觉)

    T:Wukong(M不理T)Iadmitmymistakethistime(M仍不理)I'msorry(小声)

    悟空，这次是为师错怪了你，对不起

    M:What?

    T:I'msorry.

    M:Em?Louder,please?

    T:I......am......sorry.....(S捂耳)